Queen of Spades
Poetry Feature 11: Mistaken Identity
Hello everybody! It's Day 11 of National Poetry Month. There are times when utilizing Indecision can produce a disastrous result. Find out how in the poetic drama "Mistaken Identity", taken from Spaded Truths: Themes and Proclamations.
**Indecision and Infidelity make wonderful mates. That’s why they, at times, go hand-in-hand.**
Intro I used to think Indecisiveness Was a good thing Because it meant you were Cautious enough to examine What you were getting into. I thought it was a way To give you time To really sit down And think things through. But I forgot what was inevitable. Good things don’t last always. Beginnings I remember when Love Flowed into me unexpectedly. It was the third week of November, Weather riding the cusp of Winter. I remember how he and I Talked for hours and hours: About Dreams, Aspirations, Children, Philosophies. Not once did Sexuality Bring me to my knees, But in the end, More than my mentals Were dripping wet. I remember How it was when we met. My heart begging To explode out of my chest. The Artist in him Seduced the Poet in me And how he drew for me Drew me deeper into him. The formation of the curves Led to the disappearance of my shirt, And the blending of the hues Caused the rest of my things to join my shoes. Whatever masterpiece he was working on Didn’t quite reach completion. He kissed me Like I was the finest wine And he licked me Like a Tootsie Roll Lollipop. Even when I begged him to stop, He kept trying to reach the center, Working on my clit Until I did some first time shit: While he was down south, I ejaculated in his mouth. He loves my mind, My heart, My spirit, My frame, And he can sex me Until I’ve almost gone insane. Oh, he’s got to be the one! Or so I thought. Nah, Not My Man For many months, I was in total bliss Getting good vibes everywhere From the talks to the dick. It was so good I just couldn’t keep it to myself! So I talked to one of my friends Who, surprisingly, knew him well. And she started telling me things. He couldn’t possibly Be just digging me: He was doing other shady things! She prayed That I was using protection Because I was taking a risk with a guy That had so many indiscretions. But typical female Trying to stand by her man, I closed my ears, Clipped her with my tongue: Body shaking, looking in disgust, At the phone I had flung. Changes Soon our lives got busy And filled with more stress. He and I started to communicate Less and less, But I was so busy Trying to pass all my final tests I didn’t even pick up That anything was messed up. Until one phone call Changed it all. Showdown Someone on the other end Apparently has balls, Telling me to leave his man alone Once and for all! I’m sorry; you must have the wrong man. Is his favorite pleasure spot Behind his right ear? Yes, but that’s no proof That your man is my man. Is his piercing a silver ball On the right side Between the tip and the shaft Of his circumcised dick? When I howled in hurt, His anger began to subside: Oh, my God! You never knew about me All this time? He always proclaimed That he totally despised gays. Honey, that’s what they all say When they are gay Trying to pass as straight! Where do you think he was When you tried to reach him in his room? Working, studying, Hanging with the boys. Oh, there was work, all right: Me working on his knob. He was studying, all right: My ass while he was inside my hole. Yes, he was hanging out with A BOY: The boy being me. Look, I’m sorry it had to come to this, But I thought you knew about me Because I knew about you. He told me multiple times That he was through with you Because he wanted to be out and free To have a life with me. It was last night I discovered he lied. While he showered, I saw some papers That he was trying to hide. So I took them with me Before I hopped in my ride. And it angered me to see That letters were still being written As late as last week When he told me it was over Fa sho’ about three months ago. This call was to tell you To leave him alone and stay away, But I know now my anger’s misplaced. We’ve both been a pawn In his child’s play. Checkmate I told the other man to stay on the line As I placed the call. He tried to pretend That it was all lies. If I were to believe a “fairy” over him, Then it would hurt his pride. When he heard the “fairy” on the other end, Silence was his weapon of choice. I told him it was over and hung up the phone Before he could regain his voice. By the time he did, Anger had made its home And replaced my Id. Deaf I became to his pleas, Which I imagined he was saying On bended knee. “I don’t even care that you chose him, But you lied time and time again. You pretended that you weren’t that way, That you totally despised fairies, Even hated the word gay.” “You decided to put my life at risk Going from pussy to dick. That’s the thing Which really makes me sick! What if there are others You are fucking undercover?” “It doesn’t really matter now.” “It only takes knowing About one lover To make me realize That I can’t trust you. Funny, at one point, I was thinking Of spending my life with you.” “But I can’t deal with the Indecision Of whether you want A swollen clit Or a growing erection.” “You should have told the truth: Gave me the right to decide If I wanted to be with you And live that life.” “But since you didn’t, I guess you’ll never know If that answer was yes or no, So declare yourself sexually free Because I’m definitely letting you go.” In Conclusion I used to think Indecision Was a good thing Until my relationship taught me What Indecision can bring. That shit’s not worth my time. That shit’s not worth my life! So to be with me, One has to know definitely Or he will get the palm of my hand Or just me exclaiming, “Peace!”